* I won’t even go into this, but generally, druggies are the most resourceful people on the planet.

Rick Rubin wearing a Yarmulka!

Give certain people a Yarmulka and they instantly look like a rabbi.  Rick Rubin!  Yeah!  (I was looking up pictures of Yarmulkas, and then I came across an image of Rick Rubin… so I had to incorporate it somehow.)

Example #2.  Red Solo cups.  Any regular person sees a cup.  Any college student sees a potential game of Beirut.  I don’t think this is a picture of an actual Solo cup, but it’s still red.  And it’s the first thing that popped up in Google images.

Example #3.  Pipe cleaners.  Yes, many people actually use them to clean small pipes.  Hippy pre-K teachers once discovered them and thought…art project!  I swear, I only thought those were used for shitty art projects until I saw them at a friend’s apartment in my adult life.  Same applies to macaroni (except with less confusion… people always know to eat macaroni…)

Other random examples and thoughts:
- You see toothpick.  IDF man sees Marlboro light.  (If you don’t hang around many chosen people, watch “…Zohan” and you’ll get it.  Not because it’s only in a movie– we really do this.)
- You see round rattan chair.  I see death.
- You see a box of Girl Scout cookies.  I see an empty box of Girl Scout cookies…hah!  (My roomates and I were just enjoying a box yesterday, and it happens to be in front of me…for $4, those things are still pretty damn good.)
- My animator/artist roommate saw our new orange quilted 70′s couch…his blind ass saw a canvas…(I know it sounds wrong, but I don’t care– I’m not rewording it!  But seriously, he wants to spray paint a couch– how messed up.)
- You see Febreeze canister.  College kid sees laundry being done in a minute.
- I see rubbing alcohol.  College freshman thinks vodka… hopefully not for very long.
- I see bush.  Drunk man sees toilet.  (haaaahaaaa… yeah, all beer goggle jokes have pretty much been covered by most comedians… anything is turned into a toilet, whoop de woo whoop de woo… Collegehumor has some good jokes on anything goggle related.  Probably Streeter… don’t ask why I know.)

Anyway, I’m out of time, but feel free to bounce ideas around.  You get the point.

Apparently Diddy walks around with a toothpick in his mouth too.

Diddy and OUT.

From what I’ve recently heard about Hoboken, New Jersey, the place isn’t nearly the shithole I thought it was.  I mean, it could still be a shithole, but a thorough historical analysis, aided by Wikipedia, taught me some fun facts about Hoboken that I never knew before:

- The first game of baseball ever recorded in US history took place in Hoboken between the Knickerbocker Club and the New York Nine at Elysian Field.
- During WWI, More than three million soldiers, known as “doughboys” passed through the city. Their hope for an early return can be describe by the slogan, “Heaven, Hell, or Hoboken…by Christmas.”
- Hoboken was once known as the city with “a bar on every corner” and in fact was once listed in the Guinness Book of Records as the city with “Most bars in a square mile”.
- Maxwell’s, once dubbed New York’s best rock club, was the first venue to bring prominence to The Bongos.  Springsteen’s “Glory Days” video was shot there.
- Frank Sinatra was born and raised in Hoboken.
- Hoboken Public Library has so many Frank Sinatra CDs that they count him as a separate genre.
- Scottish band Franz Ferdinand named a remake of their song “Jacqueline” as “Better in Hoboken.”
- First brewery in the United States, north of Castle Point.
- The zipper was invented at Hoboken’s Automatic Hook & Eye Co.
- Soft-serve ice cream was accidentally invented in Hoboken.
- The first Oreo cookie was sold in Hoboken.
- The first Blimpie restaurant was opened in Hoboken.

Not bad, huh?  If you’re still a hater, I guess I won’t be seeing you at Maxwell’s tonight for Eyeball Records’ Holiday Party (8pm).  The main attraction: Milton, NY-based indie rock outfit Kiss Kiss. They’re a cross between Mr. Bungle, Other Lives, and a dog with its heart ripped out (their t-shirts are almost as sick as their debut album Reality Vs. The Optimist.)

Why is she always so pissed off?

Sure, you’re probably thinking, “YO HD, a Crazy Assassin Bitch doesn’t have to be Asian to kick ass.” No, not always.  It’s just that the scariest ones usually know exactly what they’re doing.  Take Beatrix Kiddo (Kill Bill) for instance.  She’s white.  Fine.  But she didn’t learn all those moves in Rex Kwon Do.  Eastern persuation, motherfucker.  That bitch from Disturbia that simply DOESN’T DIE (I don’t quite remember what she looks like, but I have my inclinations).  Lucy Liu in Charlie’s Angels.

There are loads of scary white women too.  Usually Russian.  Check nearly any James Bond movie.  Colonel Rosa Klebb (From Russia with Love)– probably a fox back in her day.  Admittedly, Lotte Lenya was an Austrian actress.  Still scary.  Tatiana Romanova.  Pussy Galore (not Russian, still horrific.) Remember Xenia from Goldeneye?

Sure, there are some great male villains too, but that’s not what this is about.  It’s just not the same.  There’s something about Crazy Assassin Bitches (CABs for short)– whether they’re the villain or not– that you kind of like, but you really don’t… but you kind of do?  Watch the final fight from Thai film Tom Yum Goong and tell me you don’t feel guilty.

I’ve never seen a transgender CAB kick this much ass in any movie.  Love it.

Oh, in a nutshell, Tom Yum Goong is about Tony Jaa (the main actor… character names are trivial) taking down a crime syndicate in order to save his elephants (plots are trivial too.)

Anyway, point being: show the women in your life some love.  Or they’ll turn CAB on your ass and you’ll find yourself in a pickle…

Happy Holidays from Captain's Cradle

Why?  Nothing against it (I’m all for it), but this is more of a passion project than anything.  Captain’s Cradle is a musical beast started by none other than the iCompositional beast himself, herrsolera.  (I highlight my good friends in bold, apparently.) I’m referring, of course, to the largely underpromoted, underrated, and underused website iCompositions (www.icompositions.com).  Herrsolera is Mr. Solera’s username.  Now that we’ve gotten the basics cleared up, let’s give this project some background by plugging iCompositions (trust me– it’ll all make sense soon.)

I feel I must start by explaining the basic premise of iCompositions.  “iComp,” as it’s called within the community, is a website that allows independent musicians to post as much original music as they want.  Sounds an awful lot like MySpace, but there’s a fundamental difference.  Whereas MySpace primarily serves a promotional role (artists connect with fans), iComp provides a small community environment (50k registered users last time I checked, which was a while ago) more conducive to artist development and creative growth.  Sure, you can make friends on both websites, but iComp essentially runs on artists rating and commenting on each others’ songs, finding each other through chats and forums, and collaborating (and fiscally, the site runs on donations for the most part,  I think.)  Considering the size of the community, the quality of work is remarkably good, although you will inevitably find a much higher proportion of Garage Band and hobby writers/musicians/producers here than on MySpace.  Anyway, I could (and may very well) end up writing a whole article on iCompositions and why I think most bands should immediately delete their MySpace accounts (and wait to sign up until they’re actually ready… although they’re mostly clueless to begin with), but that’s not what this is about.  (Aside: Seriously though.  These artists I’m referring to are the impatient type– they get off to themselves more than they actually take the time to develop a voice.  Kinda huge if you want to be taken seriously.  Even some…er… a lot of very successful artists are guilty of self-wankedness.  Take K West, for example… nothing against him, but everyone knows he’s a wanker.  So is Yngwie Malmsteen, as most shredheads and guitarists will attest to.  Wanker to the max.)

Back to Captain’s Cradle, yeah?  Before he could afford his own equipment, Solera started off as a young chap, writing short, 2-3 minute original Garage Band compositions in the Northwestern University music lab whenever he could get a break from the rigorous quarter-based curriculum.  And they were damn good tunes, at that.  But not as good or as epic as they would one day become.  One lovely Chicago morning, his good friend, a freshman at the time, yours truly, Hi Deff turned him onto iCompositions– a website he had recently heard about through a friend in the dorms.  The boys signed up together and things were good.  Solera finally had an outlet to release his tunes, and he did so regularly.  More regularly than his analog-bent, trusted metalhead companion Hi Deff, in fact.  At the time, Solera’s tunes ranged from the folkiest of folk to the proggiest of folk.  Once Solera graduated, he went on to invest in his own Mac-based composition studio.  No longer bound by the bounds of time or the bounds of the University library, Solera went on to break the mold and turn to the dark side of rock, where he would compose some of his longest and baddest folk-inspired metal epics.  Some of these epics would mesmerize listeners for upwards of 10, 20, even 30 minutes a piece.  As the compositions grew longer and longer, so did the list of vocalists, guitarists, and producers that Solera would call upon to perform on his songs.  So did the attention these tunes would receive– nearly 30,000 plays total.

Without further keyboard wankage, I give you my first ever collaboration with Solera, released in March 2008:

 “After You Are Gone” by Captain’s Cradle.
Mind you, this was recorded on at least 4 different computers by strangers from around the world, for the most part (Solera and I actually know each other from college, in case you didn’t catch that part of the project’s history).

Hi Deff: vocals, lead guitar solo
Eidolonia: lead guitar
macoco: bass
herrsolera: music, lyrics, backup vocals

If you’re really ambitious, here’s the guitar solo on its own: http://www.icompositions.com/music/song.php?sid=96619
Back story on the solo.  In November 2007, Solera contacted me via email and wrote the following: “Right now, I don’t really want to give you any guidance – just do whatever feels right to you.  If I had to steer you in any direction, I’d say: menacing.” This is what came out.

Recording for Captain’s Cradle is always a challenge.  Even if my voice doesn’t necessarily fit the profile, it’s always fun to try figuring out exactly what the lead vocals call for and how far we can push the envelope, as well as my vocal range.  I’ve never really written about my own voice or my vocal influences elsewhere, so I suppose I’ll put things into perspective.  I only started *trying* to sing my freshman year of college.  I still *try* to sing today, but when I asterisk the word “trying” (yeah, I’ve decided to use “asterisk” as a verb”), I mean that I really only started to practice and take my own voice seriously around the spring of 2006.  I’m approximately a 2nd tenor, and I’ve learned a lot by listening to guys like Matt Bellamy (Muse), Daniel Gildenlöw (Pain of Salvation), Jack Black (fuck yeah, Tenacious D), Amos Lee, Mikael Åkerfeldt (Opeth), Russell Allen (Symphony X), Joey Eppard (3), and a ton of others.  Can I sing like all of these guys?  Fuck no.  But they’ve all played a role in influencing me in some way.  (Aside #2: I’m a total nerd for this stuff.  You could ask me exactly what I like about each of these guys’ voices and I’d probably tell you.)

What’s going on with Captain’s Cradle now?  I am currently working on my second collaboration with Solera– I will be one of six vocalists and two guitarists.  I have not heard any other parts of the soon-to-be 17-minute song besides the sections I’m personally recording, nor will I, or anyone else, know the name of the song until it is released.  As far as I know, the code name is EPIC.  Likewise, my parts have been labeled “Five” and “Six.” Forget about competing egos in this project– I think all the collaborators would agree that we’ve got enough respect for the guy as a writer and an artist that we don’t need to hear the song or know its title in order to agree to perform on it.  All I can say at this point is that Solera is almost done with the music, and we’ve already recorded most of my vocal parts at my home studio in Chicago.  My takes are now in Solera’s hands, and the piece should be done by the time weather in Chicago doesn’t suck.  I may end up writing about the recording experience itself, as I originally intended– it was quite interesting, frequently interrupted by roommates and pizza breaks, and overall, a pretty eventful session.  But hey, we got our shit done, regardless– and that’s how I like my sessions to run.

PEACE

hi deff

1. I probably know you, because I’m likely not promoting this blog outside my own social circle.
2. Considering how we already know each other, you’ve probably heard of my music blog, which I’ve decided not to plug here.
3. You probably won’t mind my personal *plugs*, because I’m not doing it anywhere else (at least not in a online public forum).

Having made those assumptions, I’ll make one more: you probably don’t really know what this blog is about or why I’ve created it.  While much of what I write here will probably be music related, the purpose of this blog is pretty simple.  It’s personal.  Sure, I like to get personal on my other sites too, but HI DEFF ain’t as much for you as it is for me.  This blog is going to be about my life, my music, and whatever I decide as long as I’m still posting.  In short, the purpose of HI DEFF is to be… and we’ll go from there.  If you do read any of my other blogs and you notice that I’ve recycled some of the same content, don’t be alarmed– my intention is probably to cut the shit and write about those same experiences from a personal standpoint.  To me, this place should also allow for more spontaneity… hence, it’s less journalistic and more “bloggy.”  And I’m okay with that, ya heard?

‘Nuff said.  Let’s start.

-hi deff.